Oh, sure, I know I’ve posted about this guy before. But did anyone watch his first NBA game tonight? I mean, besides all of Portland? He was nothing short of amazing in his debut. And his chin strap played a starring role.
It may be a bit premature to name a man of only 20 years a BMF, but let’s not kid ourselves. The beard drives to the hoop, dunks, blocks, draws fouls, will bite the head off a rattlesnake and even makes free throws. It is mean and it is in your face. Tonight declared—with trumpets and a parade and tons of confetti—that gone are the days of the LeBron Beard and we have begun the Oden Beard Era.
Mostly a chinstrap with a pencil-thin decorative stache, Oden’s jaw garden frames his face so well his opponents can’t look away, effectively keeping their eye off the ball. Basically, it renders his challengers deers in headlights. I love utility—form follows function, folks. This is as perfect an example you can have.
Do check out the beard in action (with video)
But there’s another thing I need to mention here. Rudy Fernández, the best player out of Europe, stole the show tonight with his passing and his ownership of the alley oop. Fernández looks as if he could grow a beard twice in day. Today also marks the genesis of the Petition for Rudy to Grow a Barba.
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